Mission #21 – Objective: The Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single!

By   14 War Room Comments

A Victory Unlimited Special Mission

Television, radio, and the Internet have been buzzing nonstop for years about the plight of single, black women looking for love, but what about all the single, black men? Nobody’s been bold enough to take a stand and speak out on behalf of all the good, single black men out there looking for love too.

However, now, that’s all changed. The Victory Unlimited Show  attacks this issue with the kind of guts, gusto, humor, and controversy that’s rarely heard in the mainstream media.

Based on feedback from the show’s fan base, the most recent broadcast entitled “The Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single” put forth the following list as the reasons why so many good black men are still unhappily single:

1. They keep meeting women with unrealistic expectations for what they want in a man.

2. They keep meeting women who put them in the wrong category by writing them off too quickly as not being “their type”.

3. They’re not wanted because they’re not needed. Too many women have told them that they don’t “need” a man.

4. They keep meeting black women who don’t respect them just because they “are” black men.

5. They keep failing women’s Girlfriend Approval Test. If the woman’s friends don’t like them, then that woman won’t give them a chance either.

6. They keep meeting women who are not interested in them, but only in how much money they make.

7. They’re nobody until somebody else loves them. Not enough women see them as a prize unless they see a lot of other women chasing after them first.

8. They meet too many women who don’t really know what they want.

9. They meet too many women who believe that single, good black men are “too good to be true”.

10. They’re the right man at the wrong time.

11. They meet too many women who don’t recognize a good man when they see one.

12. They don’t promote all the great things about themselves boldly or consistently enough to enough women.

The Victory Unlimited Show is a “tongue-in-cheek,” self-help show for men that’s reminiscent of programs from the Golden Age of Radio. For more details, LISTEN to the show and READ the back-story information below:

Recently, a fan of the Victory Unlimited Show who happened to be a single, African American guy living in Atlanta, Georgia contacted the show. When he called, he was on a specific mission all his own. He didn’t ask a question about dating. He didn’t ask a question about relationships.  He didn’t even ask a question about life strategy. No. This guy called to ask just one question. One question that was so heartfelt and so loaded with frustration and confusion that we just had to address it.

What was his question?

“Why is it so hard for good black men to find good black women?”

Here was a guy who thought that he had everything together—-thought that he’d been doing all the right things. He considered himself a “good man”. He identified himself as a man looking for an exclusive relationship with the right woman. He expressed great concern over the way that the news media always tells just one side of the story of black relationships——the women’s. “No one gives a damn about how hard black men have it out here too.” he said.

Well, for this man, and for all the single, good black men out there still searching for someone special to compliment their lives——-this show is for you.

To the contrary, this show is not a show for guys out there that are actually guilty of the many “Relationship War Crimes” that so many black men are accused of. No, this show is for all the single, good black men that get unfairly lumped in the same category, wrongly dishonorably discharged, or hit by unfriendly fire in the ongoing war to have a winning relationship. This show is also for the many good, black women who have always wanted to know why so many of their sons, brothers, and guy friends have so much trouble finding the right women for them.

Today, we’ll go inside the War Room and do an in-depth analysis on the “Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single”. After listening to this show, you’ll have a far better understanding of each of the scenarios listed below that good black men encounter everyday in their search for good black women:

1.  The Celebrity Propaganda Scenario
2.  The Knee Jerk Stereotyping Scenario
3.  The Nonessential Appraisal Scenario
4.  The Racial Familiarity Breeds Contempt Scenario
5.  The Busted Brain Trust Scenario
6.  The Mercenary Scenario
7.  The Gender Group Think Scenario
8.  The Circle of Confusion Scenario
9.  The Mythical Man Scenario
10. The Right Man at the Wrong Time Scenario
11. The Lack of Depth Perception Scenario
12. The YouTube Scenario

For many years now, the vast majority of the problems experienced by African Americans in the dating world have been reported primarily from the female perspective. This has got to change. Before we can even begin to go on a mission to rescue black relationships, it’s important that we take into account not just the women’s perspective, but the men’s as well.

Otherwise, we will never advance from monologue to dialogue——–which is where our only hope for future success lies.

Much respect and success to you all.

 

Soldier on!

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14 Comments

War Room Comments

14 Responses to Mission #21 – Objective: The Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single!

  1. Chief Rocker says:

    What up, VU.

    Great show, man. It’s about time somebody told our side of the black relationship story. I think that the more the truth gets out there, the more we’ll be able to “get it together”, like you said at the end of the show.

  2. Sister Soldier Girl says:

    This show was not what I was expecting. What I was expecting was just another show bashing black men (or black women). But I was presently surprised at how evenhanded this was. And the way you ended this show almost made me cry. Good show.

  3. T-MAX says:

    Hey V.U.,

    “Basketball Side Pieces”…Hah! I know you were just joking, but don’t be surprised if you see that show on VH1 next.

  4. Thanks for your comments, everybody.

    On a side note:

    The day they actually come out with a show called “Basketball Jump-Offs” is the day that I lead an invasion of Tinsel Town and begin a movement that I’ll call “Occupy Hollywood”.

  5. Clint Brantley, NY says:

    What up, VU.
    Great show, man. It’s about time somebody told our side of the black relationship story. I know I have gone through more than a few of the things that were listed on that list… This is why I am out of the game for good… It’s all about me now…

  6. Yeah, getting out of the “game” is good. Just don’t stop living your life. Why? Because it’s amazing how great women tend to appear out of “nowhere” while you’re making “Big Moves” in other areas of your life. I see this happen fairly often…

  7. Donald G. says:

    Vic! What’s good brother! Just wanted to pop in and say thank you again for putting me on the front end of the podcast. Love ya man! Talk to you soon.

    -Donald

  8. Much RESPECT to you, Donald G. All is well, here on the Front Lines. The fight to bring good men and good women together is never an easy one, you know. But you better believe we’re all up the task around here, soldier!

    Thanks again for lending your “Voice” to the cause.

    Til’ next time…

  9. Michelle says:

    First off, Great show! Thanks for the methodological & organized break down. I definitely saw myself in some of those. I think a lot of people, not just “good black men”, would agree that they’ve exhibited some of the traits you mentioned: not being ready to settle down, placing the job & career first, letting others dictate your perception. To add to your thoughts, think it boils down to immaturity & bad judgment as well. Now that I’m older & I reflect back on my younger 20s, I know I passed up some good men!

    Tell me though, for the presently mature 30 yr old woman that has a great job, never been married, and no kids – what do you do when you hear this list & think of all the men who’ve discounted you for the same reasons — superficial, gold-digging, insecure over salary differences, or even just his friends said my butt wasn’t as big as the other chick in the club so keep it stepping??? It goes both ways…

  10. Thanks for stopping by to leave a comment, Michelle. Yes, the purpose of the Victory Unlimited Show is to give a voice to the issues, concerns, and the HOPES of all “good” men. The reason I felt the need to do a show specifically for Black men is simply because there’s a silent group of men out there who do not fit the negative image that some guys portray. My listeners often write me about how they NEVER hear anyone give any airtime to their concerns. Hence, the broadcasting of this particular show.

    In regards to your comments pointing out that it’s basically all about “immaturity and bad judgment”—-I agree that this is true for both men and women. One purpose of this particular show was to highlight that the barriers and frustrations that you may encounter as a woman——many men experience as well. It’s my hope that if we start to see each other as people out here fighting to make real connections, then hopefully, more REAL connections is what we’ll make.

    As I like to say from time to time: “The biggest barriers to us connecting as people is the misinformation, the misrepresentation, and the inability to STOP condemning the new person for “crimes” committed by the old.”

  11. Jeremiah says:

    Hello, I just came across the The Top Twelve Reasons Why So Many Good Black Men Are Still Single broadcast and like it a lot, totally agree. But with identifying all the problems, what are the solutions? #goodsingleblackman

    • Jeremiah, there are several solutions to this problem. They involve things like men Knowing who they want, having realistically “high” expectations, having a willingness to “be” the kind of person he wants to attract—-and then utilizing what I have called The You Tube Strategy. Which, by the way, is defined as broadcasting yourself in the direction of as many worthy women as possible. Of course there are many other aspects to this as well—but the ones I’ve just mentioned are a good place to start.

  12. Anthony says:

    I wish good black males would stop complaining about not finding a good women when they are picky and only want the best of the best like they really deserve it. Man up, and stop being so picky, every women deserve a chance and being picky means being lonely for a very long time. Not saying you should settle for anything but talk to that woman that you probably wouldn’t talk to because she could be the one for you, the one who caters to you, lifts you up and encourages you, cooks and helps you to be the best man you can be. There are good women out there, we good men or “Nice guys” are just to arrogant to man up and leave our comfort zone. Just a thought I could be wrong but it works for me, why try to get a 10 when your not even a 6 yourself.

    • Yes, I’ve found that if guys are encouraged to “be” of the same type of caliber of person that they want, it keeps them more realistic. If both men (and women) strive to DESERVE what they DESIRE—then that will help keep them honest. However, as we all know, different people find different qualities in people attractive. So it’s always possible that one person’s 6 could be another person’s 10.

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